Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
this boner is exhausting
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
