I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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