A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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