Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize