We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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