bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
