Me too!
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
