Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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