that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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