Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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