can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
