If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
we should paint friendship bongs
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
