There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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