so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Someone signed my nipple.
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