so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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