just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
