I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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