Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I want her autograph on my taint
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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