how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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