Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
