No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
