We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Randomize