she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
