brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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