Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
