Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Then you guys just all showered together...?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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