i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
