ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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