My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
