so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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