airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
