He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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