The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
