"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
