i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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