Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
kristin has been a bad kristin
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
