Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
