i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
