let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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