just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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