You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
