I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize