Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
All the doctor said was why
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
