She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
