ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
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