You smell like a Billy Joel song
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
