I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize