the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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