Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
