It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Randomize
